Authenticity

*Recognizing and Valuing

Authenticity in your world.

What Does That Mean to You?

Walking into a room, you immediately feel tension or as if you don't belong. You look around at the faces you've encountered and there is a shift. A shift from scowling to bright smiles, but this does not quite fit the feel, the vibe you've just walked into. This is one form of in-authenticity for sure.

But, authenticity goes deeper, even on a personal level. You most definitely have been that person on the other end of the scowl to smile moment. Perhaps you have been the person who makes everything perfect for everyone but only because this makes you feel safe (bet you never considered that!) but internally, even without realizing, you've made yourself smaller. You've convinced yourself that you will allow yourself to be you, but just not now. This current situation calls for everyone else to be ok, I'll be ok later...

The statement above brings us to the brink of yet another rabbit hole. We have come so far from who we really and truly are that we do not know how to get to authentic. Our upbringing, limiting beliefs, programming, need to be safe and survive keep us separated from who we truly are at the source. Who we are meant to be and should be.

Taking the steps to authenticity are frightening. Maybe they will keep us stuck in the loop of not being genuine. Well, we've got to start somewhere, yes, we do....

The definition of authenticity states that it is the quality of being real, genuine, and true to an original source or personal values. It means getting to the core of being an actual thing and not a fake or copy, it is based on facts and true information, and living in line with your own core values instead of copying others, your self truth. That was a mouthful! A mouthful of words and statements that are most likely as far away from who you think your true self is as you can get.

Based on that upbringing, the challenges, the Eldest Daughter syndrome, Co-dependency, the school and religious programming (false comfort zones), these deeply ingrained blockages, how do we move forward towards authenticity? How do we shift away from the person we've become who has literally abandoned our true and authentic self? Where do we begin?......

Recently, I heard someone state that most people, work and home families, do not know the person who holds them together, only the functions they perform. That hit hard! As a recovering co-dependent myself, that was more than a mic-drop! The BOOM was lounder than I'd ever heard. They went on to question if you asked these people to describe you, how long would it take before they started to list what you do and not who you truly are. Another BOOM and an AHA for sure.

So, if the people around you can only list what it is that you do for them, what about you yourself? Can you fairly describe who you truly are? Drop every responsibility, every role, every task and what is left? Would they (or you), to paraphrase the author's words, know what makes you laugh until you can't breathe or what quietly breaks your heart, or what you are curious about? Have they (and you) spent so many years relying on the functions that the only way they know you is by what you do for them? THIS, this is not knowing you at all.

So, lets begin here. Let's strip away the functions first and see what is left. Let's start small with one quality, characteristic of YOU that you love about yourself that never gets to shine, that is always put away in the closet of our hearts. Invite that one true, beautiful. authentic part of you to shine. Take away one function ar a time. Be ready, they won't like it at first, you will feel awkward and out of sync with who you thought you were. But, take that one shining piece of you and give it the space to grow, to feel safe and warm and true. Encourage it daily and there will be no stopping you from there.

The process, trusting it, revealing it, is not simple easy or pleasant, but the end result is amazing, I promise you this. And my friend, I cannot wait to meet you........

Many Blessings,

Cathy